Friday 6 September 2013

PEACH MELBEAR IS SO GOOD

Peach Melbear is so good
I want it for my blood
We lap it up
Cup by cup
Zip, John and Vinny Doublepud

Peach Melbear gives us pleasure
By the pot and by our leisure
Five pints in
We're going to win
A beer erection without measure

Peach Melbear is the best
Better than all the rest
Ten pints of it
Turned to liquid shit
Our colon's it did test

Peach Melbear is the best
Until I was sick all down my vest
My pants fell down
In the middle of town

…and I can't remember the rest.

Thursday 5 September 2013

ROUGH AS A BEAR'S ARSE: PART 1

Every now and again, the hobbyist drinker in Stockport can be treated to a most enjoyable experience by spending the evening in a particular pub famous for it's logistical obscurity.  The pub we speak of is of course: The Navigation, which is also frequently referred to as: That Bastard Up The Hill We Can't Get To Because We're Too Pissed. (or the BUTHWCGTBWTP for short).

As you can imagine due to it's tricky location, The Navigation is frequently bypassed when swigging in Stockport however we are pleased to say, not this time around!

After a bit of fortuitous haggling we managed to cadge a white-knuckle ride to Stockport on The Beer Bus.  All hail The Beer Conductor for getting us there quicksharp and in one piece (if not a bit lighter in the bowels!).  We salute you!


We pulled up just outside the pub, crawled from the now Brown Beer Bus and raised our eyes and hands to acknowledge the pub with a doff of the imaginary cap.  It really had been many moons since last I swigged in this hostelry, but I am pleased to say that the decor, jukebox and regulars were all intact and just the same as they always were, as was the wonderful array of Beartown's bears on offer to us.

For those of you familiar with drinking in Stockport you'll likely already be aware of the pub, but for those of you who aren't, especially those who might live locally, might we recommend you pay a visit soon to sample Congleton's finest, it's well worth the trek up that wretched hill!

As the barman hobbled towards us we decided to start with the ever delicious Kodiak Gold, the stalwart and popular flagship brew of Beartown.  It's complex, fruity and zingy bitter notes were most welcome to our parched throats so much so that we drained two pints each in just a few seconds.

Start as you mean to go on as they say.

Next was a new brew (only been available for 15 months apparently) and was called Beartown's Best Bitter; a rather dull name considering Beartown's reputation with brew names but this didn't deter us from ordering a couple. We watched in anticipation as the dark deep malty goodness filtered and settled in the pot before chugging joyously through a most rich, earthy and satisfying pint of beer.  A very welcome addition to Beartown's range.

Several more pints of the Best Bitter and Kodiak Gold and we were well on our way to reaching enlightenment.

Tune in next time for part two of 'Rough As A Bear's Arse' where our troupe visit the legendary The Arden Arms to swig the gas-inducing Robinson's Unicorn, drunkenly piss up the side of a wall, grab some balls, and then end up on The Bus Into The Abyss!